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How to encourage a relative to finally quit the habit

22nd February 2016 Print

Muriel Froomberg celebrated her 107th birthday in February 2016, and breaks some of the hard rules of longevity - for example, she knocks back a bottle of whisky every week. However, one of her pieces of advice for long life was to give up smoking, insisting that giving up at the age of 102 has been a key part of her extended health.

There are two contrasting lessons we could take from this piece in the Daily Mail. One is that smoking won’t do us any harm and we’ll all live into our 100s, which is nonsense. Another is simply that it’s never too late to give up and feel the benefits – and that’s the lesson we prefer. Here are six other ways of getting loved ones to quit.

Don’t treat them like children

The simplest advice is this; leave them to it. Let them set their own timeline, which could mean halving the number of cigarettes in a week and halving it again, or cutting the number by one a day – it’s their choice. Watching them like a hawk, and constantly asking about their habits, might not be the best approach. 

Make it easier

If these tiny steps are possible, then go through with them: wash their clothes to remove smoke; fumigate the house; remove all lighters, matches and obviously cigarettes themselves. Take ashtrays out of the home and clean any trays in cars. Install air fresheners in each and every room. Consider using the services of a professional cleaner if necessary.

Shock treatment

In a recent episode of popular BBC drama Call the Midwife, respected GP Dr Patrick Turner was horrified to see his 14-year-old son apparently smoking a cigarette to see how he looked. For Dr Turner, a smoker who knew his son had been in his pockets, it was the last straw. He had already seen the lungs of dead cancer victims but actually witnessing his flesh and blood taking in the smoke was a much more powerful sight, and he pledged to quit - exactly as his son, who had no intention of smoking, had planned. 

It’s a tough tactic, but getting them to imagine that their children/relatives/young friends might one day take up the habit, might be enough to spur action. 

Don’t take them to places where people smoke

It might be better to stay away from the pubs and in particular the smoking areas where people loiter. Essentially you’re trying to remove them from areas that smell or remind them of the habit, and unfortunately many smokers feel most comfortable with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. 

Find alternatives

If smoking is about the actual physical action, then find substitutes. Get them anything from fresh vegetables sliced up to lollipops. Alternatively, encourage them to start vaping – while not a perfect replacement, it is at least lower in toxins, and doesn’t stain teeth, clothes or nails. It’s also more versatile with a huge array of e-cig mods available.

Don’t be too harsh when it gets tough for them

If you do happen to stumble upon a quitter smoking a one-off cigarette, don’t be too hard on them, as it is a fairly common circumstance. If it is genuinely a brief slip then nagging, preaching or shouting is more likely to make them feel regretful or angry, and the slip becomes a full-blown relapse. Think of dieting and the little treats with which you reward yourself when you’ve done well.