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What to do if erectile dysfunction is ruining your sex life

19th August 2020 Print

Erectile dysfunction is a condition that affects a lot of men around the world, and it can certainly get in the way of having a healthy and satisfying sex life with your partner. If you are struggling to get or maintain an erection, it can certainly begin to be frustrating when you want to get intimate. Erectile dysfunction can be caused by a wide range of different things, from physical conditions and medications to mental health and lifestyle habits. Thankfully, you don’t have to let erectile dysfunction completely get in the way of enjoying sex with your partner. Here are some options that you might want to try. 

Find the Root Cause

Since erectile dysfunction can be caused by a wide range of different things, it’s important for you to understand what is leading to it, so that you can get the appropriate treatment. Treatment plans are likely to be very different for somebody who is experiencing ED due to nerve damage, for example, compared to somebody who is struggling to maintain an erection because of anxiety. The best thing to do is speak to your doctor about your concerns - they will be able to perform a thorough physical and mental health exam in order to determine why you are having these issues and what to do about them. 

Treatment Options

For most men who are dealing with erectile dysfunction, Viagra, also known as sildenafil - or the little blue pill - is the most common treatment option. This medication works by increasing blood flow to the penis, making it easier for you to get an erection that lasts long enough for sex. You may also want to try Cialis, also known as tadalafil or the ‘weekend pill’ which is effective for up to 36 hours. You can explore this treatment option and more at Manual, a site dedicated to helping men live their best life with a wide range of erectile dysfunction treatment options to consider. 

Sex Therapy

If you are dealing with erectile dysfunction as a result of feeling depressed, anxious, or concerned about your sexual performance, a sex therapist might be able to help you get to the root cause of these issues. It is more common than you might think for your sexual performance to be affected by your mental health, and if it is affecting your sex life, chances are it is affecting other areas of your life as well. Speaking to somebody about your feelings and issues can be extremely freeing and can help you learn healthier coping mechanisms and change your outlook on life. You might choose to get therapy on your own or with your partner. 

Try Something Different

Most people think that you have to get and maintain an erection in order to enjoy sex, but that actually isn’t true at all. Why not try something different in the bedroom with your partner and explore different ways to be intimate with each other that don’t involve you getting hard? This will help to take some of the pressure off of you and also give you another option to get to know what you and your partner both enjoy together. If your sex life has started to get a bit boring and repetitive so far, or you are at a loss of what to do if you can’t get or maintain an erection, there are plenty of options to try including oral and digital pleasure, strap-ons, sex toys and much more - so be adventurous! 


Finally, the key to having a healthy and happy sex life isn’t being able to get a hard-on every single time - it’s actually good communication. Even if you had absolutely no problems with your erection, your sex life would not be great if you and your partner didn’t communicate about what you both like and dislike in the bedroom. It’s important to communicate with your partner not only about your general preferences but also about your ED and how it is affecting you. Never assume that your partner thinks less of you, or that they are embarrassed for you; chances are, they are thinking quite the opposite and wondering what they can do to help you out in this situation. By communicating with your partner, you will be able to work together to overcome this obstacle and enjoy a healthy and fulfilling sex life regardless. 

Erectile dysfunction makes it difficult or impossible to get and maintain an erection long enough for sex, and it affects approximately 10% of men per decade of life. It can seriously mess with your sex life, but the good news is that you don’t have to suffer it in silence. By finding the root cause and getting the appropriate treatment for you, you can start to fully enjoy sex with your partner again.